


The Tragic Tale of Failed Furniture

by Songswald



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-31
Updated: 2013-05-31
Packaged: 2017-12-13 12:10:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/824163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Songswald/pseuds/Songswald
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Pond family (Amy, Rory, River, and the Doctor) attempts to put together a bookcase from IKEA.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Tragic Tale of Failed Furniture

**Author's Note:**

> I saw a post on tumblr about your OTP trying to put together furniture from IKEA and I had to write it. Somehow it ended up being the whole Pond family.  
> Please let me know if you find any errors grammatical or otherwise.

“Sweetie that can’t go there. It has to screw in over here. It’s the only way.”  
“River, I told you it can’t go over there the bendy things need to go in the corners,” the Doctor said letting out a sigh of frustration as he attempted read the instructions.   
“Can’t you just, I don’t know, sonic it or something?” Amy chimed in. Amy and Rory had been called in around eight minutes ago but so far failed at being helpful.   
“How many times do I have to tell you, it only works on wood,” the Doctor said pulling out the offending screw driver and shaking it at Amy.  
“Oi don’t shake that thing at me. We were just trying to be helpful. It’s not our fault that you decided you needed a new bookcase despite the fact that the Tardis could just generate one for you.”  
“I couldn’t agree more. But River thought that the ones the Tardis was generating ‘felt weird.’”  
River looked up at him from where she was lying on her stomach still trying to make sense of the planks of wood and weird parts in from of her. “It didn’t feel right. I can’t explain it, it was just wrong. It wasn’t… genuine. I’m not about to leave my books on a bookcase that feels suspicious.”   
“It’s a bookcase River, what could it possibly do to your books?” the Doctor asked.  
“Well-”   
Rory, still engulfed in the project before him interjected, “Wait is it possible that these squiggly things go right here and then the bendy things go- oh wait no never mind that’s not going to work. Okay I’m out.” He stood up.  
Amy grabbed his hand. “Yeah I think I’m with you. Come on let’s go to bed I’m tired and this is hopeless.”  
“Night all.”  
“Deserters!” the Doctor yelled after them. “Come on River we can get this.”  
It had been two nights ago that they had picked up the bookcase. River was very particular about her books and had asked if they could go out and buy an actual book case. The Doctor had agreed, but didn’t realize what he was getting into until he found himself being dragged through a sum of six different furniture shops in late 20th century earth. Finally at the last one, a lonely IKEA in Helsingborg Sweden that was about to close up for the night, River found the perfect one. Beautiful woodwork with a dark finish. And it really was beautiful, the Doctor had to admit. It was just proving to be nearly impossible to put together. They’d been sitting in one of the many rooms in the Tardis trying to figure it out for nearly half an hour and all they’d done is make a big mess of it all and jumbled all the parts.  
“I wish the directions weren’t in Swedish. Why isn’t the Tardis translating it?” River asked.  
“I may have been messing with the translation matrix and I kind of… broke it. I’m sorry. I’ll fix it of course I just haven’t quite gotten around to it.”  
River huffed. “We probably could have gotten it in English if someone had landed in the right year. Okay yeah, no I’m done. This isn’t happening tonight. Let’s look at it with fresh eyes tomorrow.” She stood and offered the doctor her hand to help him get up.   
He took it and pulled her into an embrace. “Are you tired?”  
“No not really.”  
“Okay well you stay right here and I’ll go make us some tea and popcorn and we can watch a movie or something okay?”  
“Okay,” she nodded and wondered off to go pick out a suitable title.  
So they withered away the rest of the night binging on popcorn while River sat on the Doctors lap watching various movies, both of them trying to avoid the sight of the failure of bookcase that occupied much of the floor.  
And they never went back to an IKEA.


End file.
